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The Queen's driest jokes, from Bond to marmalade

A bear offers the Queen a marmalade sandwich, the one he always keeps for emergencies. She has him beat. “So do I. I keep mine in here, for later.” more

Queen Elizabeth II reigned for more than 70 years, longer than any other British monarch. Her humor was wry and quiet, and she was never embarrassed by her own flubs. Some of her best lines came when nobody expected a joke at all.

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Over a reign of more than 70 years, Queen Elizabeth II was known for a wry, quiet humor.

Take the cake. At one cutting, someone helpfully points out that there is a knife. “I know there is,” the Queen says, and carries on with something more unusual.

World leaders got the same treatment. Standing with the heads of the G7, she asked, “Are you supposed to be looking as if you're enjoying yourselves?” They laughed, and one assured her they had been enjoying themselves, in spite of appearances.

An older adult female wearing a blue and yellow floral dress with pearl jewelry, holding a black handbag, set against opulent grand palace decor. The headline runs in white letters across the lower third.Save
A bear offers the Queen a marmalade sandwich, the one he always keeps for emergencies.

After all the places he has filmed and all the species he has studied, Sir David Attenborough still found his 90 minutes with her in the Buckingham Palace garden something quite different. They talked about the trees she planted for her children and joked about the noisy helicopters over London.

Prince Harry once sat beside her to play a video from the Obamas, a teasing answer to a challenge he had made them. “Careful what you wish for,” it warns, and it ends with a cheeky “Boom.” Her reply is drier than the dare. “Oh, really. Please.”

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Prince Harry plays her a video dare from the Obamas, and her answer is short and dry.

Presidents were fair game too. After George Bush made a slip-up about America's bicentennial, she began her toast at a dinner by wondering whether she should open with the time she was there in 1776. The room roared.

So were prime ministers. Canada's Justin Trudeau reminded her that he was the 12th prime minister of his country to serve during her reign. “Thank you, Mr Prime Minister of Canada, for making me feel so old,” she said.

Queen Elizabeth II, with white hair, sits smiling in a gold-framed chair, wearing a colorful floral dress. A headline runs in white letters across the lower third.Save
Told he was Canada's 12th prime minister of her reign, she thanked Justin Trudeau for making her feel so old.

Her boldest joke had a whole stadium in on it. For the Olympics, the BBC made a short film called “Happy and Glorious,” and in it she plays opposite Daniel Craig as James Bond. “Good evening, Mr Bond,” she says. By the end the two of them seem to jump out of a plane under British parachutes, and the crowd is asked to stand for the Queen and the Duke of Edinburgh.

Which brings us back to the bear. As her Jubilee party is about to begin, he says, “Happy Jubilee, ma'am, and thank you for everything.” She answers in three words. “That's very kind.”